One of my favorite topics for The Work has been Money.
So many thoughts about money, so many sticky areas of concern, so many feelings about buying, selling, getting, accumulating, or losing money.
Many of the beliefs we have about money are like broken records, repeating themselves over and over, and we don’t even realize it.
Well, I sure didn’t realize it.
The beliefs went by so fast and were so nerve-wracking, my usual way was to ignore, avoid and not get involved with money if at all possible. I didn’t really like even noticing my beliefs. They were so stressful!
Trouble is, when you ignore an uncomfortable situation….it tends to build up and get more pronounced over time.
So when I found myself about to lose my home to foreclosure, out of work, unexpectedly divorced, without health insurance, and unable to pay for my children’s music lessons any longer (in fact, they went on the reduced lunch program at school for families with low income)….
….I HAD to look at my beliefs about money.
It all began with one.
I don’t have enough money.
Now, it’s helpful to review with yourself what you don’t have enough money for. You probably have enough money to eat, have a home, sleep, drink water, get your basic needs met.
Maybe you couldn’t buy that car for sale down the block, maybe you can’t go shopping this afternoon and buy lots of clothes. Or maybe you don’t have enough money for guaranteed security, in case something happens? Medical fees in case you have some, later?
Or maybe you don’t have enough money to keep your house, or to stay home instead of going to work at a job you don’t like that much.
So once you see what you don’t have enough money for….
….hold your disappointment and your situation vividly in your mind and answer the four questions.
I don’t have enough money (in my case, to pay off my entire house loan).
Is that true?
Yes, it’s a fact. It’s absolutely true.
But notice how quickly there’s an emotional reaction….it will always be true, this is terrible, I’m stuck, I hate debts and this mortgage is a big one, I HAFTA get more money, this is urgent, I’ll work harder.
Worry, worry. Push, push. Harder, harder!
For some people, this can get exhausting.
So who would you be without the thought? Without the belief that right now you don’t have enough money?
Look around wherever you are, noticing your environment. See if you’re safe, comfortable, supported.
I notice I am.
It’s even exciting, to feel what it’s like without that belief that there’s not enough of something. To trust this moment, not by thinking positively but by actually noticing what is here, right now, in the present.
Turn the thought around: I do have enough money.
It’s so easy for me to see. I have enough to be here in this house right now (even though I owe money on it). I love living here. Every month I send extra to the mortgage company. I’m paying the most I can. It’s actually fun, it’s a game. The balance drops lower every time I open a statement.
Another turnaround: I don’t have enough of myself….and neither does money.
Yes…..I see how in the past I haven’t shared myself, I’ve been self-critical, I haven’t been a very nice companion to myself, and I haven’t been very kind to money. I’ve yelled at it for leaving me. I’ve felt both inferior and superior to those other people who have a lot of it, or none of it.
I’ve avoided learning about money, I’ve gasped at items that cost huge amounts of money, I’ve been hyper-worried about money, I’ve been disrespectful towards money.
After that work on money, I began to make friends with money and to trust that I had just the right amount of it at any given moment.
Funny, money comes around more since I started being such a good friend to it, and to myself.
“I began to notice that I always had the perfect amount of money for me right now, even when I had little or none. Happiness is a clear mind. A clear and sane mind knows how to live, how to work, what e-mails to send, what phone calls to make, and what to do to create what it wants without fear.” ~ Byron Katie
Much love, Grace
P.S. We’ll do some good, awesome work on Money and other concerns in Summer Camp for anyone who wants! June, July and August…come one, come all if you’d like to join with me and fellow inquiring travelers for 1, 2 or 3 months of fun, diving into all kinds of investigations on painful beliefs we carry. More on Summer Camp soon!