Think It Should Be Different? You Lose.

flowerbudByron Katie has a funny demonstration she offers from time to time to an audience about forcing something, or wishing for something, before its ready, before it ever happens.

She turns to the vase next to her chair, often filled with gorgeous colorful flowers….

….and she takes one stalk out of the vase, a closed bud, and holds it in front of her looking directly at it.

“OPEN!” she says with intensity.

“I SAID OPEN!” she repeats again.

The audience chuckles.

“OPEN NOW!!!!!!”

All of us in the audience laugh uproariously as we realize the way our minds and thoughts do this constantly, all day long, in many situations.

Arguing with what is….wishing it would go differently, faster, better.

Katie is speaking to a powerful idea that nothing can come before its time.

There is a natural order of things.

Seed, gestation, bud, bloom, decay, decomposition.

Everything flows forward, then disappears.

There is not even a guarantee of how it “normally” turns out, if there is a normal and if there’s a common way of it. There are exceptions to every normal.

Sometimes the process of life blooming, then fading back….

….ends just after the gestation period, or the bud dies before blossoming.

Humans die as babies, I notice. As children, I notice. At all ages.

Anywhere along the way, something might happen to stop the direction, or change the course of events.

So there we are, demanding, yelling, having a tantrum about the state of affairs. Shouting until we’re blue in the face.

Having a hissy fit about that person, this condition, our possessions, our situation, even our states of peace or enlightenment!

Not good enough! Not THERE yet!

And our yelling will never do anything. Ever.

“Argue with reality, and you lose….but only 100% of the time.” ~ Byron Katie

The bud stays closed until time, light, life force all come together in the perfect moment for it to open up.

It has very little to do with what we want, or don’t want.

Have you noticed?

Wait….you mean if I want a younger, unhurt body that’s not going through menopause….or to have a million bucks in my savings account…..or to be more successful in my career….or to already have published my book….or my dad to be alive….

….I might be setting myself up for suffering?


Who would you be without your story?

Laughing, I bet.

Much love, Grace

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