The retreat is over that I’ve been on. Time to go home.
Have you ever felt a melancholy, or sadness, or a sense of wanting something to continue?
Don’t let this change! I want this to stay just the way it is, in this moment, in this experience.
I don’t want to forget this peace.
I want to keep this awareness, joy, openness, learning.
Or, you might have had the experience that you want to keep a person in your life….
I don’t want to break up! I hate getting divorced!
Or, to keep your good fortune….
I want to always keep this pile of money and never ever have it diminish!
Or, to keep your health, your fitness, your youth.
I want my body to be the way it was, I hate this change.
Wanting to maintain a moment or experience can have a little edge of sadness, angst or worry.
Maybe a big edge. To put it mildly.
I noticed this myself, in tiny moments as this retreat came to a close.
Our group has shared, everyone has connected beautifully, there is a feeling of love and kindness and trust. I have new insight to my experience of being a human being, alive on this planet.
I HAVE TO KEEP THIS FEELING!
How do you react when you think you need to keep something?
Even if you still have it, do you notice you feel clingy and grabby?Like you need to milk this for all its worth (as the saying goes)?
If a meaningful or pleasant experience is indeed over….
….do you feel terrible fear, sadness or panic that your future is not as bright?
Who would you be without this thought?
Open to this moment here, right now.
Not only open to it…but accepting of it…resigned to it.
Wow. What a relief.
The turnaround: I do not have to keep any feeling. I have to NOT keep this feeling. It is not possible to keep any feeling. I have to let go of this feeling.
No “I” is keeping or releasing anything.
Ha ha ha!
“We forget that there is no future, there is no peace later. Whatever is arising in the now is all I have.” ~ Ross Oldenstadt