The other day I was strolling through shops on a street in a gorgeous part of my town, a dear friend visiting who wanted to see the city.
As we entered a quiet boutique, my eyes glazed over.
I nonchalantly picked up a sweater and immediately turned the glossy, elegant black paper tag so I could see the price.
I’ve had this same reaction before.
Who shops here? Is this real?
Then the wheels start cranking on what kind of person would actually purchase this or be interested or blah blah, Hollywood influence, luxury, boring, waste….
….all my judgments streaming by at 260 kilometers per hour.
What it means. What it is. What it’s doing. Who’s doing what with it….
How much would I have to have, to feel comfortable paying almost a grand for a sweater?
No idea at this point. Maybe there is no amount, I just wouldn’t be interested, ever.
At least I caught myself. In fact there was some part of me just chuckling from the sidelines, noticing I love that sad, less-than not-enough money story.
I should have more, they should have helped, I didn’t do, they did, I need, they don’t, they’re lucky, I’m not, I want, I need, compare, distract, hopeless, sinking, anxious, frustrated, I will never.
A very sad story.
This “never enough” story comes along in many other arenas for people besides money.
My relationship, my possessions, my safety, my body, love.
Who would you be without that Never Enough story?
No story at all of the past, where something uncomfortable happened (whether five minutes ago or forty years ago) AND no story of the future, where something better will happen (whether in five minutes or in ten years)?
I’d be right here.
Only now. No other place.
Noticing the memory of a soft, gorgeous sweater with numbers written on a tag on it because someone made that up, just like all numbers and money.
I would notice I have so much, it’s crazy.
Abundance, silent energy, pulsing life, ecstasy, energy, images in my head, excited because I love money and I love this moment. I feel like money is juicy and delicious and like I could eat it.
Laughing at how hilarious my mind is to think of this.
Without the belief that I don’t have enough, need more, long for that time later when price tags won’t matter….
….there would be no incessant measuring of anything.
Oh such delight at even imagining no stressful story about money in this moment! No hunger for money! No hunger at all!
You can do this with anything.
Start to imagine.
Forget your sad story.
Even forgetting just a tiny bit…may send you skipping down the street.
Or you could just think of skipping, you don’t even have to actually do it.
“Without opening you door, you can open your heart to the world. Without looking out your window, you can see the essence of the Tao. The more you know, the less you understand. The Master arrives without looking, achieve without doing a thing.” ~ Tao Te Ching #47
Ka-Boom. Right now, without doing a thing, I feel infinitely abundant. Unlimited. Generous!
You can too, right now.
Much love, Grace