Recently I’ve been having a difficult time making a decision about leaving home to attend a big annual event (known as The Cleanse) with Byron Katie.
Don’t get me wrong….it’s a beautiful event where Byron Katie sits with an empty chair on stage, and one by one, people sit in the chair next to her to do The Work, to investigate a situation or person in their lives who’s giving them grief.
In the end, through 3.5 days of that available chair on stage, perhaps 20 or 30 people get to sit with Katie as she facilitates them in looking at their beliefs about something terrible that happened, or something super irritating, something tragic, even something tolerable but persistently stressful.
While the four questions are the same for everyone, Katie–like all of us–has her original and unique way of working with them.
The process is so fascinating delving into the mind and what we really believe is absolutely true, that 400 people will come just to listen.
So yeah. It’s a cool event.
So is staying home in Seattle with my family including my son who will be back from college, my very cute husband who has a birthday on January 4th, and festivities of connection with people I love.
When you have a decision to make between two really awesome things….what to do?
This can happen with far more than two options for where you’ll be located during a particular time of year.
You might have a choice between two people you’d really like to have a committed relationship with, you might have to choose between two delicious meals on the menu, you might have to choose should I stay or should I go….
….the important thing to note is “this is stressful!”
Which means….time to take a look.
What I’ve found in this decision-making angst are usually three OTHER stressful thoughts that are the real confusors:
- I will miss something VERY meaningful
- I could make the wrong decision
- I can’t trust my decisions (because see #2)
But what if you didn’t have any of these beliefs?
What if you didn’t think you’d miss anything….EVER? No matter what?
Turning the thoughts around: I won’t miss anything, it’s not possible to make the wrong decision, I can trust all my decisions.
What a load off!
I notice I look at flights, I look at hotels, I don’t make reservations, I feel joyful and I wind up talking with my friend Gai in Australia on skype and drinking tea.
It is obviously not necessary to know what I’m doing at the end of December right now.
I will have a clear yes or no when I do.
It may not actually even be up to “me”.
“The universe will give you what you need, against your best thought….When you do The Work and turn your thoughts around, you find advantages for what happens. You win if you’re right, you win if you’re wrong. In my life I always win, win, win, win…” ~ Byron Katie
In this moment now, all is well, future unknown.
As I feel this to be true, I realize that in the future, it will also be true….now.
Oh! I do always win!